i had to have sex with a man i know. i did not want to, but somehow i knew it was going to happen anyway. i was trying to distract him in order to stretch out the time, and put it off for just a little bit longer. i woke up before it happened, i always do, even when i want it. (date unknown)
my childhood friend had single-handedly begun an operation where she was trying to make people move out of the apartment area in which i live. she would ask them strange questions, offer them off-putting snacks in the stairwell, and steal their packages from the post van, only to deliver them to their doors herself. she was successful, people started moving. she encouraged me to try my hand with it as well, so i decided to start with a group of girls who were selling snacks outside. my friend had told me that i should try eating frozen nectarine, and i was doing so when i walked up to them. they asked why i didn't just buy it from them, claiming to sell it. i asked to see for myself, but they started showing me only different kinds of frozen melon pieces. i told them that those were in fact melons, and this seemed to make them very insecure. my friend ended up joining in, and she said something that made me laugh so hard i woke up. (10/8/25)
a woman wanted to kill me. i'm not sure exactly why. it was either because i had a car that she wanted, or she had one that i wanted, and she didn't like how i was going around looking at it. (9/8/25)
my abusive ex wanted me to buy pants for him. sand or beige colored work pants i guess they were. he was complaining to me that he could never find the right size, waist size 30, and he would do something bad to me if i did not manage to get him a pair of the desired variety. the store was a mess, it was huge and nothing was sorted by size. i found many pairs of pants that at first glance seemed to fit every criteria, but something was always wrong. the store also sold ugly, inconvenient, and just strange looking garments. my mother was there with me. there was something she wanted me to do, but i was unable to find out what it was, or complete my original objective. (7/8/25)
a man appeared in my apartment with the intention to rape and kill me. beat me to death i think it was. i was trying to sleep when i heard him say something, and then i saw him standing in a corner in the hallway. i barely escaped but made it out alive. it was my actual apartment, stairwell and outside area. i tried calling the janitor, same janitor as in real life, to ask him to change my locks. i was unable to get in touch with him. (7/8/25)
i was going to have relations with a very tall british man, who had a wife and two children. he slid it between my thighs from behind, the way they used to do it in france if i'm not mistaken, it was six inches long and i was very into it. we had to stop before we could go further, because his family needed to use the room we were in. his daughters started drawing and doing homework at the table. the room resembled the bedroom i had in my family home. i knew that i lived there. (25/7/25)
my cats were alive and with me at a funeral home in stockholm. i wanted to get a piercing, and kill myself. (19/9/24)
my phone wouldn't charge using my regular charger, and would glitch out when i attempted to use it. this made me very anxious, as i needed a functional phone for a trip i was going on in a few days. i set out to find a new usb-c cable. looked all over my home, and the homes of other people. i ended up at a restaurant full of people. there was a cat there. everyone else knew the cat, and told me stories about his life. apparently he had been some sort of criminal, and was a former drug addict. this was a normal-sized cat, unable to speak human languages. i was told about how the cat used to buy shoes, "nike conferences" to be exact, in purple cheetah print, and snort cocaine off of them. i happened to be wearing purple cheetah print pants at the tine, and the cat went up to where i was sitting, stood up on his back paws, rested his front paws on my leg and pretended to snort cocaine off of my pants. everyone in the restaurant went crazy for it. they thought it was funny as hell. it was. (9/6/24)
i had a dog that had to be put down, and the dog was somehow the last reminder i had of someone who had died. i was horribly sad and let the dog cuddle with me in my bed. also went to a club and saw bands, spoke to the members. (date unknown)